inside of me.

Almost half year i didn't spent my moments to update this blog. Mainly, i am not a regular blogger who have plenty of excitements in life.

Back to a normal working life is just plainly reorganize my body system to have an organized time-table.

Money is the motivation to keep me doing something that can make me feel motivated & inspired.
If i have a choice to do something in my life. I will prefer doing nothing. And plainly sleep & listening music for the rest of my life. Whatever i am doin in my entire life since to be influence & inspired by the music i passed by.

There are no closer things which can make my mind calm down to draw in concentration except music. When i say music. It is my selected music. Not the music that somebody else play for me.


Drawing is not a fully enjoyment. But it did bring some contented moment once you achieve something that out of expectation. Unfortunately, the moment only arrive very rare as I know what i want to see. It is a suffering process that only person in myself could feel the pain.

Everyday after working, i spent my time to hold the pencil and keep drawing in solitude. Practise my sense in lines & contour. Hope it can improve my digital sketching. I don't have a computer to work in my current rented room. It is indeed suffering for one who spent years to accumulate the motivation to paint in digital. Haha, i am one creature that needs lotsa reasons to decide on something. Over 6 months, i can only feel myself improve just a little. I know there is a big distance to get into the level i wanted to step into. All i need is precious time & tons of personal moment.

Yeah.. i don't need people to entertain me right now. I am hell busy as i should. Working hour takes away all my time. Whenever i having some empty slot, give me a piece of mind with silent sleep or sweet music.

Especially this career related to my entire living style & living motive.

I met this closer friend. He asked me to work hard to achieve like whoever peoples he knew surrounding him. I felt extreemely offended when people actually asking me to work hard.

In real life, peoples judging the achievement by looking at the assets that you possessed.

I am not 100% hardworking. At least i am self-initiative more than 50% to do my job. haha..why not 100%?
Yeah, i will losing my soul and offended to many peoples surrounding me.

There is a balancing measurement in life. We couldn't giving out 100% to something we love. Else, despite something else which couldn't grab it back no matter how much you given out later.

I learnt this lesson and i afraid to repeat the history.

So friends who found this message incidently here. Please don't question about my life. If you are enjoying your life. I blessing you all the time.


And don't call me out for nonsense meet-up. I rather stay home and pick up a meaningful movies to study. There are more things to study for me.

Argh...new artwork... next time or maybe not. I am not proud of them.. I am kinda stress out with no computer to draw at home still.
I just don't want to bring up my ancient AMD64 PC to rented room.


It can't even support latest games. haha...

In my new year resolution, i wish i can..
- play more games to increase my knowledge & art sense. I don't play games to kill time indeed.
- watch more movies that can stronghold my motivation to create art.
- meet more cool peoples that can eventually motivated me. I just don't like people who talk alot and work a little. I couldn't get the idea why i really try to avoid such type of peoples. Probably i afraid to revive the lazy disease in myself.
- More money.. It's true. I won't deny it. To support my family & myself. And quit spending too much concern in how to make extra income. And focusing in my CG journey.
- Healthy and contented. Why no happy? Artist can hardly feel happy most of the time. The moment we are happy is when we don't want peoples to worry about our situation. Should i say that is professional emotional management in life? Yeah, so strike back to you. No sour face to me too. I am giving you a glad smile.
- Peace in everywhere. It's tough. haha... Greed & lust inside human is always hard to forbidden.
- Lastly, i want to do something major in next year. I don't mean marriage..haha...Damn majority of my friends had been marry... Those are luxury life & a burden to my life.

I am one difficult person to cheer up..hehe.

May! I got my job... damn.. (finally...)

Lotsa sketches in May. Somehow, i only showed those which pushed me to another level.

Early May :


Middle May :


End of May :





I like the idiot Cop which only spent me little time. And Octopus was done yesterday nite. Pretty cool feeling about it. It is about composition, perspective & space utilized in a drawing.

this is the first image i done to apply these knowledge. I know it looks amateur. I won't estimate myself. Give me more time..

I got my job. I was drew crappy things everyday. I am really sux in environmental ...haha..
Again, give me more time. I am growing up in every failures.

Speed painting 45mins Tentacles+Fish+wings

sux..haa

20mins - Beautiful Burnout by Underworld

make me happy..

Theme : undead + Flame + underwater..

This is sux...hell...yes

Speed painting 45mins Taurus

taurus - 45 min... argh!

March Collections.. GAGAGA

The 1st one is kinda a smooth process.

:Draw a sketch layer.
:Put a color basic underneath the sketch layer.
:Duplicate the sketch layer and keep it for reference when necessary.
:Add a new layer, color over it to cover all the sketches outline.

Saw such method for a few times. Finally, i understand how it works exactly after viewing Jason Chan videos.


Nothing much to say for the rest. Ohh... The red tail gal is for Pepper Project from IFS Singapore. Thanx to Mike for the appearance improvement.

Right now, I hope i am getting better in terms of mentality & artsy too.. Good Luck.

Talking or writing is so unnecessary when you realize Artworks means thousands words that comes out of your mouth.

Time for Environment.

Here>>~~ My first environment for year 2008. It is always one of the subject i wish to approach.

Due to it involved a lot of accurancy in perspective issue, sense of depth, atmosphere, and form & lighting. I rarely do environment as painting fun.

This piece was done after i "incidently" viewed a conceptart sketches of the day, DSG 1334 : Environment : The Incredible Egg-Tech-Scape, A top the complex Cyber Domes. I don't completely understand what is "A top the complex cyber domes means". I just wanted myself to finish something without thinking too much before i had my lunch.

I finished almost 50% of the basic layout. Completed the whole piece with another 2 hours something. Totally around 3 to 4 hours, I guess. Whenever i try to force myself keep painting from an ugly looking piece. It will eventually flows in some magical sparks into it.

I believe the theory from Marko Djujervic. Don't give up too soon in your art. There are alot of information still haven't pulling out from my brain. It could be serious stress out if you are in a bad mood.

This one was finished under a relaxing & calm mood. It is fast & pretty fine for the final result.
Time to spent more time in environment.


Here are a few brushes test from m@ in conceptart. One of the coolest artist. Hope to learn from a person like him. It is my ambition to reach his standard. haha. Thanx for the greatest effort to m@ for sharing these awesome customize brushes.


His sketchbook from conceptart.
http://conceptart.org/forums/showthread.php?t=73169





p/s:You need to draw some background sometimes. To get a job faster in industry. Environment is the faster way.

Silencio

This piece was done before i went to sleep last night. Drew this outta my mind after viewed those photos of important peoples in my life from the past to present days.

Inspired by shadowplay from Joy Division.


It's time to start some mechanical design. Don't restrict myself ever again.
Try before i said I can't.
Paperblue is always my greatest inspired artist. What he did is my motivation when i am low.

This dude expressed the feeling after the last chat session with her. So here she goes again.
I need to move on.
It takes pain, tears, torn, guts, sorrow and a lot of my time to pick up the shattered pieces back to a look-able shape. The crack is there to remind me this damage. It would be as good as a motivation & a promises.

These few days was my very tough hours to hack in my life. Why every chinese new year of mine sure stucked with some impact which i couldn't erased easily.

Missing her. Sorry to make the purest person becomes twisted and deformed-minded.

Everything she own goes away. It hurts even more when you realized it was caused by you.

Look at her pic & own parents picture.
My deepest sorry to all of them.

I am never intended to hurt anyone in their heart & soul. I am bearing with the torturing & sacrify here to towards my goal.

Things would never be accepted until you eventually make it.

How far this will go on?!

Get this over with my solo force. (again, again, once again, another again...) like i usually did all the way down.


-Silencio-

haha..Happy MICKEY year~!

I had spent around 3 days for this piece before Chinese New Year. It had been a while i didn't try to complete a full piece painting. I was painting the character and added the background later on.
I think this is my current best piece. It would be stay best for a while. Cause i am going crazy right now. PAINT! PAINT! PAINT!... GIMME PAIN PAIN PAIN.. DARN IT~. I gotta discipline my life style even more.

I still couldn't sleep with 5 hours per day. I am such a sleepy head. Issit normal? I am believing i am staring at my monitor to paint too many hours sometimes.
Tell me how EDISON!. I mean the Greatest Inventor scientist.. hee..

This one was actually done before Chinese New Year. I was tried to paint a dino directly from my memory. Then i planned to add a scene to it. Tonight, i spent around 2 hours to finish the whole painting, included lighting, sky, big dino skin, overall atmosphere. Anyway, it is a lousy piece. I just try to push myself to complete a poor-looking painting.


Hee.. My brothers all went back. I haven't painted for a week due to the Chinese New Year festival. Eating, playing, enjoying whatever like the same old year. So, i did this yesterday. I am trying to bring back my freaking creatures imagination. Drawing too many humans for so many months.


Done by yesterday too. An effort to produce a 3D-alike image. Don't guess what it is. It is a FREAK. I kinda like the outcome. It looks pretty cool to me.


So, what i had done today. This little girl i did in the afternoon. Never done something in high detail so quick and "interesting". I couldn't grab the look from the sketch. I am still no good enough as usual.

p/s: Now i remember why those master image looks so crispy & vivid. I read about using the Filter>sharpen the image. It will bring up some details of the downsize image. It really helps to make my painting more alive.




So, i reupload the image which i sharpen both of them. Compared it yourself. The previous one is blurry. Current piece looks more crispy clear. Thanx to my brain.

HAPPY MICKEY YEAR..YEAH!
I don't haf money to attend EXPLOSION IN THE SKY CONCERT!... aiksss....

If you fall, I'll pick you up

Yeah, does the art seems to have more form? I know why alot of my previous image looks flat. There is not much contrast in the right area. All is about lighting & shadow at the right place.

The first piece Red Gal was done within 3 days(on & off). The 2nd image was the modification of the foreground materials. Anyway, i am not happy with it. I had changed the abdomen muscles from 4 packs into 6 packs due to a suggestion from a friend.

"If you fall, i'll pick you up" was painted 3 days ago. Just finished some touchup & background today. It's a quick process without too much thinking.

The last piece was rendering within an hour. Not too bad of its quality compare to my previous experience. (The female looks a bit elder...haha..over muscular face?!.)

All is about light, shadow & form. It's an important knowledge to pop out the information from a drawing.