One wisdom word from Jason Manley

first, you are not trapped in your situation. You can get out of any situation you want if you are willing to take the pain of doing all the things you dont want to do..the long hard way. The fruitful way.

At seventeen I was homeless and orphaned, taking care of my fourteen year old brother who I somehow managed to keep in school. I had dropped out of school. I did two years of wasting time eventually trying to get my head on straight. At nineteen I was homeless again. Scraped together enough money to get my ass to arizona to study art. Got a temp apt to get me through to the end of the month and took a job at subway (applied all over til I found something). The subway job paid enough money to sometimes eat and pay my small studio rental. I went back to school to get my graduation and was working full time (thought I needed to graduate from HS to get into a good college). Trust me...it was fucking painful. I transferred to a community college the following year and slowly got better and better jobs. Worked telemarketing fundraising to afford a 1977 datsun and art supplies. Shittiest job ever but paid double what subway did. Worked three jobs during the summer to get caught up including going to alaska to work the salmon docks across the country. I did not give a shit what it was, if it paid for my goals to be met and didnt involve anything illegal, I did it.

As time went on I realized I needed to arrange my priorities again. I took a night time job so I could exhaust all my energies in my art and studies. Eventually got a job at AT&T...Att this is Jason how may I help you?...I was still far behind those who had life handed to them their whole life. However, I was catching up. In time I realized it was not a chase against others but to only my own race to my goals. Kept the nose down. Chose friends who worked on art or learning always. Ignored the time wasting folk who never will amount to anything other than regular. Grew up around enough of those to realize the difference. After three and a half years I took my first art job and quit my shit job...have lived with and from art ever since.

By the time I was 29 I had achieved every goal I had reached for when I first set out. That is when I realized it was time to set new goals...each time this happens it feels like starting over...get something done..start again...in time your life becomes what you want it to be. Even those of money have to do this if their life involves learning, skill, and growth. It is not money that holds people back...is just their own mind.

The hard part about certain situations is not everyone is told they can do and reach their goals if they just work their ass off starting RIGHT NOW. Some know it and wont work for whatever reason. They listen to that voice that says I want to chill and watch tv or i dont feel like it. Others have addictions or mental issues keeping them from growing and learning. I didnt want to be any of that. I wanted to do cool stuff...to have an interesting life...and to work in a creative way.

Hard manual labor growing up taught me that my mind would rot if I chose that kind of path. I wanted something to use my mind. Bored if not...and with boredom comes making trouble or distraction. Gotta turn that into work ethic...no choice. Carl Dobsky was telling me this about the atelier every day. It has to be just uncomfortable enough to make the coolest thing to do be art. If there is a blaring tv or anything else, than there are other options. Options that keep one from not working to reach their goals.

Complacency is the womb of mediocrity. You clearly are not complacent. So do something about it in every free second of your day. All this wandering around doing not a whole lot but thinking isn't getting you much done. It is however, giving you a taste of life many others would never have the guts to explore. Just dont stay down there too long without coming up for air.



Good luck,



Jason

inside of me.

Almost half year i didn't spent my moments to update this blog. Mainly, i am not a regular blogger who have plenty of excitements in life.

Back to a normal working life is just plainly reorganize my body system to have an organized time-table.

Money is the motivation to keep me doing something that can make me feel motivated & inspired.
If i have a choice to do something in my life. I will prefer doing nothing. And plainly sleep & listening music for the rest of my life. Whatever i am doin in my entire life since to be influence & inspired by the music i passed by.

There are no closer things which can make my mind calm down to draw in concentration except music. When i say music. It is my selected music. Not the music that somebody else play for me.


Drawing is not a fully enjoyment. But it did bring some contented moment once you achieve something that out of expectation. Unfortunately, the moment only arrive very rare as I know what i want to see. It is a suffering process that only person in myself could feel the pain.

Everyday after working, i spent my time to hold the pencil and keep drawing in solitude. Practise my sense in lines & contour. Hope it can improve my digital sketching. I don't have a computer to work in my current rented room. It is indeed suffering for one who spent years to accumulate the motivation to paint in digital. Haha, i am one creature that needs lotsa reasons to decide on something. Over 6 months, i can only feel myself improve just a little. I know there is a big distance to get into the level i wanted to step into. All i need is precious time & tons of personal moment.

Yeah.. i don't need people to entertain me right now. I am hell busy as i should. Working hour takes away all my time. Whenever i having some empty slot, give me a piece of mind with silent sleep or sweet music.

Especially this career related to my entire living style & living motive.

I met this closer friend. He asked me to work hard to achieve like whoever peoples he knew surrounding him. I felt extreemely offended when people actually asking me to work hard.

In real life, peoples judging the achievement by looking at the assets that you possessed.

I am not 100% hardworking. At least i am self-initiative more than 50% to do my job. haha..why not 100%?
Yeah, i will losing my soul and offended to many peoples surrounding me.

There is a balancing measurement in life. We couldn't giving out 100% to something we love. Else, despite something else which couldn't grab it back no matter how much you given out later.

I learnt this lesson and i afraid to repeat the history.

So friends who found this message incidently here. Please don't question about my life. If you are enjoying your life. I blessing you all the time.


And don't call me out for nonsense meet-up. I rather stay home and pick up a meaningful movies to study. There are more things to study for me.

Argh...new artwork... next time or maybe not. I am not proud of them.. I am kinda stress out with no computer to draw at home still.
I just don't want to bring up my ancient AMD64 PC to rented room.


It can't even support latest games. haha...

In my new year resolution, i wish i can..
- play more games to increase my knowledge & art sense. I don't play games to kill time indeed.
- watch more movies that can stronghold my motivation to create art.
- meet more cool peoples that can eventually motivated me. I just don't like people who talk alot and work a little. I couldn't get the idea why i really try to avoid such type of peoples. Probably i afraid to revive the lazy disease in myself.
- More money.. It's true. I won't deny it. To support my family & myself. And quit spending too much concern in how to make extra income. And focusing in my CG journey.
- Healthy and contented. Why no happy? Artist can hardly feel happy most of the time. The moment we are happy is when we don't want peoples to worry about our situation. Should i say that is professional emotional management in life? Yeah, so strike back to you. No sour face to me too. I am giving you a glad smile.
- Peace in everywhere. It's tough. haha... Greed & lust inside human is always hard to forbidden.
- Lastly, i want to do something major in next year. I don't mean marriage..haha...Damn majority of my friends had been marry... Those are luxury life & a burden to my life.

I am one difficult person to cheer up..hehe.

May! I got my job... damn.. (finally...)

Lotsa sketches in May. Somehow, i only showed those which pushed me to another level.

Early May :


Middle May :


End of May :





I like the idiot Cop which only spent me little time. And Octopus was done yesterday nite. Pretty cool feeling about it. It is about composition, perspective & space utilized in a drawing.

this is the first image i done to apply these knowledge. I know it looks amateur. I won't estimate myself. Give me more time..

I got my job. I was drew crappy things everyday. I am really sux in environmental ...haha..
Again, give me more time. I am growing up in every failures.

Speed painting 45mins Tentacles+Fish+wings

sux..haa

20mins - Beautiful Burnout by Underworld

make me happy..

Theme : undead + Flame + underwater..

This is sux...hell...yes

Speed painting 45mins Taurus

taurus - 45 min... argh!